Comedy Act 3: make the couplets stop

3.1
A of E starts this scene calling his wife shrewish- hmmm i wonder why i'm not crazy about him... He has confusion with his own dromio and Dromio responds with a very interesting image, especially since you all know by this poitn I am crazy about textual culture/images:
If the skin were parchment, and the blows you gave were ink,Your own handwriting would tell you what I think.
A of E is at the gate of his own house and waiting to be let in for dinner. Of course, his brother is already inside with his wife... and because of that we get the delightful exchange between the two dromios, and while they do not get to see each other yet, they get to talk to each other so there's a lot of an actor to play with as far as vocal tone/speed/ways the one Dromio may or may not match the twin Dromio.
Dof 
What art thou that keepest me out from the house I owe?
DofS 
[Within] The porter for this time, sir, and my name is Dromio.
D of E 
O villain! thou hast stolen both mine office and my name.
Dear God there is just SO MUCH RHYMING! I can't handle it!! After trying a few more times to get into his house, AofS decides screw this, i'm going to the courtesan I know to eat with her. That will piss my wife off and give me dinner:
I know a wench of excellent discourse, Pretty and witty; wild, and yet, too, gentle: There will we dine.
I'm thinking that in the battle of HORRIBLE husbands in Shakespeare... there are a lot contenders for the winner (though sadly I think there are clearer winners in his contemporaries...)

3.2
AofS an Luciana enter and it seems brothers fall for sisters because he is hitting on her a great deal. Of course Luciana seems either not to notice or knows how to play dumb (Isabella anyone?) and just instructs him to treat his wive better in general:
And may it be that you have quite forgot
A husband's office? shall, Antipholus.
Even in the spring of love, thy love-springs rot?
This line gives me hope that maybe, just maybe he didnt actually sleep with his brother's wife and called things off with Adriana after the eating before the love ties. Luciana then goes on to win horrible sister of the year with this advice:
 Or if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth;
Muffle your false love with some show of blindness:
Let not my sister read it in your eye;
Super mindset. As long as your wife doesn't KNOW you're committing adultery it doesn't count right? UGH. AofS then responds with a horrible pick up line
O, train me not, sweet mermaid, with thy note,
To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears:
Sing, siren, for thyself and I will dote:
Mermaid.. I could... maybe buy? Other than its creepy to think of half fish times. but a siren? Who wants to be compared to one who makes men dash themselves upon the rocks? I do not think that's flattering at all. Then more rhyming times, though a fantastic play on words here:
 LUCIANA 
What, are you mad, that you do reason so?
AofS: 
Not mad, but mated; how, I do not know.
 Eventually Luciana leaves the scene, supposedly to talk with her sister about Antipholus' love for them or lack thereof for adriana... and DofS enters and thereafter follows perhaps my favorite scene in the whole show when he describes how the cook thinks he is DofA aka her lover:
D of S: Marry sir, such claim as you would lay to your horse; and she would have me as a beast: not that, I being a beast, she would have me; but that she, being a very beastly creature, lays claim to me.
 Then the move to the extended metaphor of this huge woman as the globe (Side note: my first impression of Rick Blunt was watching him in this show and every time I read this play it is his exact inflection I hear when I read the line "she is spherical" SO GOOD.)
DofS:
No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip: she is spherical, like a globe; I could find out countries in her.
AofS: 
In what part of her body stands Ireland? DofS 
Marry, in her buttocks: I found it out by the bogs.
AofS 
Where Scotland?  
DofS 
I found it by the barrenness; hard in the palm of the hand. 
AofS 
Where Spain?
DofS 
Faith, I saw it not; but I felt it hot in her breath.
AND my personal favorite part of this game: 
AofS 
Where stood Belgia, the Netherlands?  
DofS 
Oh, sir, I did not look so low.
 The Boys from Syracuse (couldn't help myself) decide it is best to leave this strange place:
I will not harbour in this town to-night: If any bark put forth, come to the mart, Where I will walk till thou return to me. If every one knows us and we know none, 'Tis time, I think, to trudge, pack and be gone.
And my personal favorite line:
There's none but witches do inhabit here; And therefore 'tis high time that I were hence.
there is just something hysterically funny to me about the line there's none but witches. And the rest of the scene is mainly setting up the rest of the series of errors with the forged chain shenanigans and when payment will be due/who will pay it/etc.
Act 4 actually has more than 2 scenes, so more to talk about tomorrow...
In the meantime and in other shakespeare news... we are looking forward to our production meeting for Midsummer tomorrow and working our way through preparing our script for rehearsals. More Shakespeare news to announce soon. (Probably in about 2-3 weeks) so look out for that!